Fact of the Day

According to a recent poll, Congress' approval rating is...





wait for it...





seriously, this is going to be worth it...





prepare yourself...





9!

How is that even possible? I assumed that you could get at least 10% of Americans to approve of just about anything. In fact, I'm pretty sure that that's the theory behind this.

Si! Si!

Rico and the Milwaukee Brewers would like to thank Big Jim and the Cleveland Indians for trading reigning American League Cy Young winner CC Sabathia to Milwaukee, where he is destined to lead the Brewers to their first World Series. In his first start last night, he earned the win after allowing two earned runs in six solid, if unspectacular, innings. Projecting the rest of the season based on last night’s performance, he shall finish 15-0 in his 15 regular season starts.

Also, he’s as cute and as cuddly as a teddy bear. A 6’7”, 290-pound teddy bear with a 96-MPH fastball.

Rock rocks

Speaking of music, I'm certainly no expert on modern rock, mostly ignoring the radio stations on which it plays. Having said that, it seems like there's a pretty good collection of rock music coming out these days. Whenever I happen to flip to a Daughtry, Nickelback, or Three Doors Down song, I find myself enjoying it. I think American Idol winner David Cook also has a good chance of putting out some good straightforward rock music if he goes in that direction.

At any rate, radio rock today is certainly better than it was 5-10 years ago, when it was dominated by some truly awful bands. (I'm looking at you, Limp Bizkit and Creed.)

It's even funnier when you see a guy say it while playing a guitar and occasionally blowing on a harmonica

"I'm in a weird situation 'cause I like rainbows, but I'm not gay.

So I wear a rainbow on my shirt, but then under it I gotta put 'Not Gay.'

But I'm not against gay people, so then under that I gotta put 'But Supportive.'

I just think it's weird that one group took refracted light.

That's pretty greedy, gays."

--Demetri Martin

A Thought on Country Music

I find it interesting that rock and pop artists have been popping up more and more in country music in recent months and years. Just to name a few, The Eagles, Jewel, Sheryl Crow, and Darius Rucker (Hootie!) have all recently had songs on country radio. I suppose there are two possible explanations for this (not to say that they are mutually exclusive):

1. When rock/pop stars are washed up and can no longer succeed in their original genres, they move to country music because its really easy to be a country star. After all, all country fans are dumb yokels.

2. Pop and rock are so image-centric that when you reach a certain age, you can no longer be a mainstream star in these genres, regardless of the quality of your music. Country fans, on the other hand, care only about the quality of the music produced, regardless of the age or sex of the person producing it. (See 55-year-old George Strait touring last summer with 17-year-old Taylor Swift.)

I've thought about this for a while, but I've never had a way to test these competing theories. Now, a possible litmus test has emerged: I just heard that Jessica Simpson will be performing at a big country music festival in rural Wisconsin later this summer. If she does attempt to move into country music and if she succeeds, clearly theory #1 is true. If she fails, however, there's hope for theory #2 yet.

(Also, for what it's worth, I'm a fan of Hootie's new country song, "Don't Think I Don't Think About It.")

(Also, despite the anti-Hootie backlash that emerged in the late-1990's, Cracked Rear View was a phenomenal album. I just heard "Let Her Cry" on the radio this morning, truly a timeless song.)

What a Great Great Story

For those of you who haven't seen the story on the rescue of the Colombian hostages, go here. This is absolutely one of the best stories I've read in a really long time. 15 people held captive (including three Americans) are set free AND terrorists are embarrassed, to top it off.

To summarize, Colombian troops infiltrated FARC, the left-wing guerilla/drug trafficking movement. Over the course of a year, the gained the trust of the group's leaders and rose to positions of power. Then, earlier this week, the moles ordered the movement of 15 hostages to a central location and made them board a helicopter (ostensibly controlled by FARC) right in front of the terrorists' noses. When the hostages got on board, the moles convinced the remaining real FARC members to abandon their weapons and brought the hostages to freedom.

It's always a good day when terrorist groups get hoodwinked and bamboozled.

An Alternate Ending

For those who haven't seen Boromir's brilliant scheme:

And the even better:

So That's How He Did It

Movie Aragorn's absurd prowess becomes explicable:

Why'd they have to translate it into Elvish though?

Breakfast

Today I had my typical breakfast of two pieces of toast and a cup of tea. However, instead of the usual honey, I used cheese.* Also, instead of my usual non hamburger, I decided to go with a hamburger. That is all, carry on.

*On the bread, not the tea--I only put cheese in my tea for special occasions, such as Wednesdays.

Loose ends

1. My wife knew of my love for John Adams prior to our marriage, so she has no excuses now. (She didn't know of my secret affection for Johannes Gutenberg though.)

2. Yes, my family is probably going to be wealthy some day. If that day comes, however, I'd like to think that I'll retain enough self-awareness to refrain from flaunting it under the guise of complaining about the commute to my second home to a poor 25-year-old law student.

3. Diablo II had a powerful ability to bring roommates together. I hope III can do the same.

4. Nick the Stick was only absent from my sweet allegory because I couldn't think of a historical fuigure from that period who would try to walk from Farley to Knott and end up on the other side of a lake. John Burgoyne, maybe?

5. Jake took his first steps the other day. It's a dizzying, terrifying experience to watch.

My Closing Argument

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I am here to present you with facts. Not opinions, not speculations, just facts. Cold, hard facts. Inescapable, undeniable facts. And here are those facts.

1. Big Jim's unwillingness to enter the fray and eagerness to achieve victory through cowardly and ungentlemanly means led the Smash Bros. Coalition (i.e., the fray-entering warriors) to develop a system that included the number of knockouts as a factor in determining victory (the BCS).

Think about that for a moment. Nintendo was unable to develop a system that adequately compensated for Big Jim's craven play. This gutless, spineless style of play was so unforeseeable – indeed, so incomprehensible – that the greatest video game company in the history of mankind failed to account for it.

2. Once the Smash Bros. BCS (see point one) was adopted, Big Jim countered by constantly pressing for team battles. Some people, when confronted with the reality that their style of play was no longer viable, would change that style of play. Not Big Jim. Rather than adapt a manly fray-entering style, he instead resorted to seeking to fight in two-on-two scenarios. There, he could continue his fray avoision and do so under the guise of being a good teammate. Despite Jim's protestations below, no right-minded Smash Bros. warrior ever left the experience of teaming with Big Jim without severe scars. Years later, poor Pikachu still goes to physical therapy three times a week.

3. Big Jim fathered a child with Sally Hemings. There, I said it.

As you can see, when we look at the facts, it is irrefutable that Big Jim is a pusillanimous, bastard-producing loser. Having said all that, I'm willing to give Big Jim a chance at redemption. All he needs to do is buy a Wii, buy Super Smash Bros. Brawl, and become a master in the art of brawling. It's that simple.

Always into the East . . .

Ok, so the trailer's not all that good, and the website says something about fighting the failing powers of heaven. Why does Blizzard always ruin things that way? Warcraft and Starcraft had the same damn problem. Anyway. II was ridiculously addictive. With any luck, III will follow in its footsteps. Problem. Despite Rico's urging, the only time I'll be able to regularly play a video game will be during my year abroad. I'm thinking I'll have better things do in Rome. Maybe I should take a year off to "discern" or something?

Lies! All Lies!

Only I know how it truly went down.

While our esteemed Rico certainly presents a plausible version of events, the perfect linkages in his construct surely should make the discerning reader leery of accepting his version of events. The regrettable lack of Nick the Stick is merely the first in a series of gaping holes. I might also point out that the Wierema and Pontzer areas of Smash Bros. were largely separate save for the occasional reunion game. While the regular player of need hardly be reminded, our less practiced readers might not be aware that Samus' Up B is Falcon's best friend. Without the incapacitation provided by this nigh un-blockable move, the 10 second windup on our avian commander's punch renders it all but useless. Finally, I might add that Rico is not only wrong on the particulars but offers a strangely static vision of Smash Bros. history. As the records clearly show, while my play with Samus was unorthodox, it was undoubtedly the most effective style of play for that character. As I progressed to Falcon and Donkey Kong, rarely was I absent from the fray. The bizzare complaints of a certain roommate and Pontzer that my characters threw too much are otherwise inexplicable.

Oh, one more thing. Rico's analysis of the Ponz is spot on.

Today's Smash Bros. History Lesson

Reflecting on John Adams, I can't help but notice the parallels between the Continental Congress and my college experience playing Smash Bros. (Spare me the criticism. If something can't be reduced to a Smash Bros. analogy, it's not worth studying.)

We would routinely play two-on-two team battles. Whenever Big Jim and I would team up, I would inevitably be Captain Falcon, the bombastic and badass brawler. Jim, on the other hand, would choose Samus, the archetype of a jobber. Naturally, I would do the heavy lifting for the team, shouting "Show me your moves!" and "Falcon Punch!" all along the way. Jim, of course, would allow me to take a two-on-one beating just so he could stay in the corner and charge up his Big Shot. Despite my demands to "Get in the fray!" the most assistance I could hope for would be the occasional Up-B. Then, at the end of the fight, just as I was about to complete my heroic one-on-two victory, Big Jim would come in, fire one Big Shot, and steal my kills.

So it was in the Continental Congress. While John Adams was up fighting for independence on the floor of Congress every day, Jefferson sat on his hands like a scared little boy. Adams would take a beating from opponents of independence such as John Dickinson, and Jefferson would remain silent, providing virtually no assistance. Once Adams had heroically swung Congress to vote for independence, Jefferson hopped in, wrote the Declaration, and stole all the glory.

To fill out the analogy, Wierema has to be George Washington, always ready for a fight but smart enough to find one on good terms. And clearly Pontzer is the French: only fighting when it suits his own interests, prone to spectacularly violent disasters, and far, far too effeminate.

The Perils of Wealth

Yesterday, I was having lunch with an attorney from the company where I'm working this summer. She was telling me that she was about to go on vacation to her family's second home in Michigan's Upper Peninsula. She said it was nicer than her first home, which is no small feat considering the neighborhood in which she lives.

Then she had the gall to complain to me that she had to drive to the house while her husband got to fly the family plane. She finished the complaint by saying, "You know how it is."

As a matter of fact, I don't.

Wiiiiiiiiii!

One of the reasons I've been on hiatus for so long, much to the chagrin of my six fans, is that we recently got a Nintendo Wii. I can say it's unequivocally awesome.

The game that comes with the system is Wii Sports. It was prominently featured in the original Wii commercials ("We would like to play") for good reason. The games (baseball, bowling, boxing, golf, and tennis) are simple, intuitive, and fun, and they really set Wii apart from the other Next Generation gaming systems, which are so focused on raw power. All five sports are fun to play, and Wii Sports is perfect for just about everyone because the learning curve is virtually nonexistent.

Along with Wii Sports, we purchased Mario Kart Wii initially. It's very similar to all the recent Mario Kart games with the exception of the Wii wheel, which really adds another challenging element to the game. The other fun feature is the inclusion of tracks from previous Mario Kart games, going all the way back to the initial Super Mario Kart for SNES. It's a lot of fun to see how the game has evolved, although some of the tracks chosen for inclusion are puzzling. Also, Rainbow Road is as difficult as ever.

Lastly, my brother got me Super Smash Bros. Brawl for my birthday (over a month late, but that's another story). While I've just begun to tap into all the different features, I can tell you one thing: this ain't your daddy's Smash Bros. I didn't play Smash Bros. Melee too much, but Brawl seems to have adopted Melee's frantic pace. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but something I'm not used to after playing something approaching 1,000 hours of the original game during college.

The other thing that surprised me about Brawl was the sheer number of features. In addition to your traditional multiplayer free-for-alls and "survive and advance" modes, there is an actual story mode (The Subspace Emissary) and a slew of mini-games, challenges, and features.

The final sweet feature about Wii is the free online gaming and wireless access. Whereas playing against AI can get tiresome after a while, online play offers an almost limitless challenge. Now the task is to get all my college friends to join in. Especially those who receive stipends from their Ivy League schools' Classics Departments. Hint, hint.

John Adams

Mrs. Rico bought me John Adams, the HBO miniseries, for Father's Day. Thus far, we've watched the first two parts of the seven-part series, and I'm surprisingly conflicted.

On the one hand, it's truly brilliant television, a rare feat in the days of I Survived a Japanese Game Show and Celebrity Family Feud, (on ABC and NBC last night, by the way). Paul Giamatti and Laura Linney are simply phenomenal as John and Abigail Adams. They both perfectly capture the profound intellect, surprising warmth, and deep love of the Adamsseses. They also capture the couple's personality quirks without descending into the slightest bit of caricature. The series is very well produced, largely maintaining historical authenticity with small and acceptable embellishments for dramatic purposes. (My only complaint thus far is that Washington looks much too old. He was only 42 at the time of the First Continental Congress, and the actor portraying him is 55. Giamatti, by contrast, is 41, while Adams' was 38 in 1974.)

As you may already know, I'm a huge early American history buff, so it's really exciting to be able to watch my favorite historical moments captured so beautifully. Already we've seen Henry Knox, the 300-pound bookseller turned Continental Army engineer, transporting British cannon through hundreds of miles of wilderness aided only by field animals. All my favorite quotes and moments from the pre-war period have been used, and there are so many additional scenes I'm already anticipating. Plus, it's great to see how captivated my wife is by the series, even if she's getting a huge crush on Washington. (Can you blame her?)

And yet, on the other hand, I'm slightly jealous that Adams is being shared with the wider world. I've always felt a special connection with Adams, and I've always identified so closely with him, warts and all. I like to think I share his virtues (service, self-sacrifice, a passionate love of his wife, an eagerness to debate and fight for his beliefs) as well as his flaws (stubbornness, arrogance, pride, an occasional need to be coddled, a tendency toward feeling unappreciated). David McCullough notes in his stupendous biography of Adams that he is, in a sense, America's forgotten founding father, often confused with Sam Adams and generally unappreciated and underrated. While I'm happy he is getting the appreciation and publicity he richly deserves, I always kind of relished the idea that Adams was my founding father.

Blog Bonanza 2008!

Because (1) I have nothing to do at work, (2) I can't really ask anyone for things to do, and (3) I want to look a little busy, I've decided to type long blog posts into Microsoft Word, email them to myself, and post them when I get home.

Lucky you!

Banned in Canada?

Definitely won't hear that joke nowadays.

Wouldn't a Bazooka Be a Lot More Fun?

As it is, darts will have to do. Best individual reaction time (guessing is cheating) is 0.132 s. My highest rating is "Rocketing Rabbit." Rico, let's see if your superior Smash Bros. skills translate to other fields.

64 Years

The Authoritative List of the Greatest Movies Ever Made!

Well, friends, I've done it. I've compiled a list of the greatest movies ever made. I've seen movies spanning a period of 70 years, and I can now tell you with great confidence the ten best films in the history of the world.

Let me tell you: Putting together such a list isn't easy. Think of all the great movies there have been through the years, Casablanca, Citizen Kane, The Godfather, on and on and on. Distilling such an impressive group down to ten is quite a challenge. Having said that, I believe my list is perfect.

Without further adieu, the top ten movies of all time:



10. Who cares?
9. Irrelevant.
8. Some stupid thing.
7. !!!
6. I don't know, uh, Mortal Kombat 2: Annihilation?
5. Probably some Hitchcock movie.
4. Blah blah blah.
3. Nothing Michael Moore ever made.
2. First loser.
1. IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan IronManIronManIronManIronManIronMan

Lollapalooza was already taken.

Apparently Big Jim is contemplating a Midwestern tour this summer. I don't have much to say about it, except that I have the perfect title: "Pi's, Psi's and Alibis: Big Jim's 2008 Greekfest."

I think it has a nice ring to it.

Dedicated to Barack and Michelle

Aerosmith's Eat the Rich:

Well I woke up this morning
On the wrong side of the bed
And how I got to thinkin'
About all the things you said
About ordinary people
And how they make you sick
And if callin' names kicks back on you
Then I hope this does the trick

'Cause I'm sick of your complainin'
About how many bills
And I'm sick of all your bitchin'
'Bout your poodles and your pills
And I just can't see no humor
About your way of life
And I think I can do more for you
With this here fork and knife

I promise more blogging once finals are over.

I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means . . .

From a truly, absolutely, utterly fabulous op-ed in the Washington post by Patricia McGuire, president of Trinity College:

Of course, church leaders, including institutional presidents, also expect Catholic colleges and universities to manifest clear respect for the church and its moral teachings across the spectrum of issues in human life and moral conduct. How we manage that expectation within our respective communities of diverse scholars and students exercising their free-speech rights is at the white-hot center of many controversies. Controversy itself is sometimes the most fruitful way to teach about our faith.

The critics would have us ban plays, speakers, student clubs, faculty members and alumni guests whose words or deeds run contrary to the most orthodox interpretation of Catholic teaching . . .

Truly, absolutely, utterly fabulous in its willful misinterpretation of Church teaching. Hi oh!

Low-hanging fruit first. That last sentence I quoted is a doozy. We'll ignore the the first part since it manifestly isn't true and dwell upon the predicate. Does Ms. McGuire have another way of interpreting the faith? By orthodox she obviously means "hard-line" or some such. Kind of clumsy to give the game up though, isn't it? I mean, doesn't everyone claim to be an orthodox Catholic? If you don't think your views are consistent with the "real" Catholicism, why on earth would you call yourself Catholic?

If we can now backtrack to the full initial paragraph. Have you ever heard a more weak-kneed support for the Catholic Church?* Can't a school like, oh, say, Cornell "show respect" for Catholic doctrine? So, the Church claims to offer the most the accurate means of learning the truth of existence and meaning of living a human life. Ms. McGuire will take that as one among many factors before embarking on a course of action. Lovely.

Notice the skill with which our fearless leader inserts "free speech rights" into the equation. A Catholic school is a private entity. There are no free speech rights. Nor should there be. The government of the United States is not in the business of regulating speech in private schools, or businesses for that matter (Same thing. Oh, snap!). However, some sort of professed allegiance to the first amendment, does provide excellent cover.**

*I don't think I want to know if the the answer is "yes."

**I'm guessing that Ms. McGuire would not tolerate (nor should she) a professor shilling of the KKK on one of her surely august quads.

Another Poem

Prince of Wales tea.
It's good for you and me.
Hidey, hidey, ho.
Heedy, heedy, hee.

---

It also makes damn good coin jar.

All-American She-Witch

In a world where Britney and Jamie-Lynn Spears are singlehandedly corrupting our nation's youth, Carrie Underwood is truly a breath of fresh air. She's wholesome, talented, beautiful, and a college graduate to boot. She's the kind of celebrity I wouldn't mind my (completely hypothetical) daughter taking as a role model.

Having said all that, her most recent song annoys me. All-American Girl is a fairly typical fluffy country-pop girl-power song. The second verse, however, has our protagonist falling for the star of the football team. While girls probably think his devotion to her is romantic, any man can see that this girl is nothing but trouble.

'fore you knew it, he was dropping passes
Skipping practice just to spend more time with her

His coach said, hey son what's your problem?
Tell me, have you lost your mind?
Your daddy says you'll lose you free ride to college
Boy you better tell her goodbye

Naturally, he fails to heed the coach's warning. The two end up getting married and having a girl of their own.

On the surface, this appears to be a "Happily Ever After" story. But of course the truth is more insidious. What the hell is this girl's problem that she's letting her boyfriend risk jeopardizing his future so that they can go to the mall? Not to mention that he's letting down all his teammates. If she truly cared about him, she wouldn't act so selfishly.

Wisconsin gripes

Ahh Springtime. As we all know, Spring brings us longer days, the sounds of birds chirping, and eight to fifteen inches of snow.

Wait a second! Eight to fifteen inches of snow? Unfortunately, yes. The National Weather Service has issued a 'Why Would You Live in Wisconsin, Dummy' Warning advising against travel of any sort.

I figured there would be more snow before the end of the season, but I foolishly believed that the worst of it would be over. Silly me.

Incidentally, this is the second time the snow has crushed my plans to attend religious services. (We got sixteen inches on Ash Wednesday a few weeks ago.)

In other news, Notre Dame won its first round NCAA basketball game, beating George Mason 68-50. Alas, I wasn't able to watch it because Wisconsin was playing at the same time. Tomorrow the Irish will play Washington State in a crucial 4-5 seed matchup. Again, alas, I won't be able to watch it because Marquette will be playing at the same time.

I hate you, Wisconsin.

Liveblogging Barack

Thanks to the miracle of Spring Break, I'll be brining you a liveblog of Obama's major speech today.

9:12: Senator Obama's major speech on race and politics is set to begin in a few minutes. Obama is giving the speech in large part to address the serious criticism that has arisen during the past week over the extremely offensive remarks of Obama's former pastor, Jeremiah Wright. These include "G-- d--- America," "the US of KKK A," and, referring to 9/11, "America's chickens are coming home to roost." Part of the reason that the controversy has become so important is that not only is Wright Obama's long time pastor, but he also married Obama, baptized his two children and received more than $20,000 in donations from the Obama family as recently as a few years ago.

Also, there are no less than 8 American flags behind the podium.

9:50: More than 35 minutes late, it appears the speech is almost ready to begin.

9:54: Obama begins by referencing both the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution. It is a profoundly moving opening. Though this speech is being given in a small room, it immediately evokes much of the soaring oratory from his arena speeches.

9:56: He does a really good job at placing himself into a long train of racial uniters by discussing both America's history ("striving for a more perfect union") as well as his own ("not the most conventional of candidates").

10:00: Obama mentions Wright for the first time. "Unity" has replaced "Change" as the theme du jour of the Obama campaign. He's casting himself as the middle ground between racial dividers on both the right and the left (Rev. Wright).

10:01: Obama concedes that he disagrees with some of Wright's political views and acknowledges that they are profoundly distorted views of the country. He appears to be distancing himself more now than he has up to this point.

10:02: He pronounces "divisive" as dih-VIH-sive. Never heard that before.

10:03: He begins to defend his membership in the church, calling recent reports "caricatures." Even if that's true, I've never been to a church that could be caricatured in the way that Wright's church has been.

10:06: The church is a work in progress that makes up the joy and bitterness that is the black experience in America. Indeed, Wright contains the contradictions-the good and the bad- that make up the black community. I can no more disown him than I can disown the black community in America. People like Wright and my (possibly racist?) grandmother are an undeniable part of me.

10:09: We cannot ignore race at this time in our history. To do so would be as big a sin as Wright's speech to begin with. He gets his first applause when he comes full circle on the unity issue: If we ignore race, we cannot come together to solve the issues facing our country today.

10:10: Gets another education when addressing segregated schools: 50 years after Brown v. Board, we still haven't solved the problem of inferior schools.

10:12: Addressing the persistence of black poverty, he throws a bone to white middle America, acknowledging that old welfare policies may have exacerbated the problem.

10:15: The anger in the black community is real and powerful. We can't dismiss it. We must understand it. But we must understand the white experience as well. Most white people don't feel benefited by their race, don't believe they must bus their schools to the inner city, and don't understand why they must pay a price for affirmative action when they did nothing wrong. Both black anger and white resentment are counterproductive.

10:19: We must work together to overcome the racial divide. The black community must unite with the white community to work toward our shared goals. The black community must demand more from its fathers and must not succumb to despair and cynicism in the face of discrimination. This is good stuff that will really appeal to middle America.

10:21: He is really hitting a stride now, evoking ideals of overcoming our flawed past to come together to form a more perfect union.

10:23: Hits the bible, saying we must be our brother's keeper. Further, Wright is a distraction, and by focusing on him, we cannot accomplish the change for which the country longs.

10:25: The children of America are not "those kids," but "our kids." Whites and blacks and Hispanics don't have health care. People of every race have lost their jobs and homes. Corporations are shipping jobs of people of all colors.

10:29: He closes with a story of a nine-year-old white girl whose mom lost her job because her mom got sick and had to miss work. The girl convinced her mom that her favorite food was mustard and relish sandwiches in order to save money on food. The girl eventually worked for the Obama campaign. In doing so, she met an elderly black man who said he was he was supporting Obama because of that young white girl. I actually thought it was a goofy ending. He would have been much better off closing with the flourish of a few minutes earlier.

Summary: He only touched on Wright briefly, and didn't really address the specific criticisms that have been brought. But his genius is in his ability to move the debate. This speech was an eloquent argument for racial unity. If he can get that to be the lead story, it will be very effective in calming white fears. I'll be interested to see the news coverage tonight.

Great Moments in French History

1. While reading an article in our French for Reading course, a History PhD student mis-translated a sentence because he was unaware that Napoleon was exiled to St. Helena.

2. Our teacher, a sixth year French lit-crit student, learned during our class that the crown prince of France was known as the Dauphin.

Am I taking crazy pills, or is our educational system breaking down?

I like numbers

Here is a complete list of numbers that do not repeat letters when they are spelled out (i.e. 3 doesn't count because it has two E's): 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 40, 46, 60, 61, 64, 80, 84, 5000.

There's your random fact for the day.

Great Wits Are Sure to Madness Near Allied

If you're looking for the real thing. It's included in this set directed by Karajan. Probably my favorite CD I own.

A Red Letter Day!

Someone just got The Landmark Herodotus and Lost Battles. On the same day. Not that I have time to read either, of course. The Herodotus is especially tempting. Maps galore! But alas, it's now time to study French.

Rocky 2008!

I recognize that the cross-section of people who love both Rocky IV and politics is probably quite small, but what the hell.

Come to think of it, a McCain v. Obama general election could set up just like the entire plot of Rocky IV (see my post immediately below).

Playing the role of Ivan Drago, the unstoppable Communist force dominating the boxing world is Barack Obama, the unstoppable near-Communist dominating the political world.

John McCain plays Rocky Balboa, a formerly great figure who's now thought to be over the hill by most observers.

Starring as Apollo Creed, Rocky's former nemesis turned respected peer, is Hillary Clinton.

In Act I, it is revealed that Dragobama is coming to America to fight an exhibition bout against Apollary. Though Rocky tries to talk her out of the fight, she's convinced that she can show this uppity youngster a thing or two. However, from the opening bell, it becomes quickly apparent that Apollary was woefully unprepared for the onslaught unleashed by Dragobama. Apollary's corner fails to throw in the towel, and Apollary is left beaten, bloodied, and on life support. Closing out Act I is Dragobama's fateful line, "If she dies, she dies."

Rocky is faced with an existential dilemma. Having just seen his peer killed in the ring by Dragobama, he concludes that his only choice is to face him for one final showdown: a debate at UC-Berkeley. His wife, however, has other ideas. When she tells him he can't win, he recognizes that maybe she's right, but he's going to fight anyway:

No, maybe I can't win. Maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me, he's going to have to kill me. And to kill me, he's gonna have to have the heart to stand in front of me. And to do that, he's got to be willing to die himself. I don't know if he's ready to do that. I don't know.

With the world against him and no one-not even his wife-thinking he stands a chance, Rocky goes into the wilderness and trains.

At this point, we cut to a training montage: Rocky, telling people the truth, Dragobama speaking empty platitudes. Rocky, riding the straight talk express, Dragobama, using class warfare rhetoric. The scene ends with Rocky standing atop Mount Rushmore repeatedly screming "Dragobama!" at the top of his lungs.

We arrive at the big debate. Polls show Rocky with nearly no chance. At the beginning of the debate, as the foes shake hands, Dragobama greets Rocky with, "You will lose" and "I must break you." Dragobama unleashes his dazzling array of oratorical assaults on Rocky. Though Rocky takes a vicious beating, he continues to fight. Just when things look hopeless, Rocky lands a wholly unexpected counter punch that fells Dragobama. Seizing an opening, Rocky pounces on him, attacking him as weak on national security, pro-taxes, and too inexperienced to lead this great nation. Even the Berkeley crowd is inspired by Rocky's words and begin to chant his name. Dragobama is unable to recover, and Rocky scores a KO by winning the electoral college 269-267.

After the debate, Rocky turns to the liberal crowd, and delivers this rousing speech:

During this debate, I've seen a lot of changing, in the way you feel about me, and in the way I feel about you. In here, there were two guys killing each other, but I guess that's better than twenty million. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that if I can change, and you can change, everybody can change!

Fade to black.

Everybody look at me!

I gave my son my sticker today. Never too early to teach him a lesson about voter fraud.

I did pencil in McCain today, and thanks to my vote, he carried Wisconsin. I didn't see his entire victory speech, but I really enjoyed this line, turning his sights on Obama:

I promise to fight every minute of every day of this campaign to ensure that voters aren't deceived by an eloquent but empty call for change.

Maybe I'm just fooling myself, but I'm beginning to believe that Obama is actually beatable. It's kind of like the scene in Rocky IV when Rocky finally gets Drago to bleed and Rocky's trainer Duke says, "You see? You see? He's not a machine, he's a man, he's a man."

Marshalling the evidence

Just so we're keeping track, Roger Clemens wants us to believe that:

1) Brian McNamee is lying about Clemens, despite the fact that his accounts of steroid provision have been largely confirmed by contemporary player Chuck Knoblauch and Clemens' good friend Andy Pettite.

2) Andy Pettite "misremembered" their conversation years ago, somehow confusing Clemens' discussion of a TV program that showed the benefits of HGH on old people with him saying that he had HGH shot in his ass.

3) Clemens' wife spontaneously mentioned to McNamee that she wanted to get HGH shot in her ass, without any prompting or even discussion of the subject with Clemens.

4) Clemens' career spontaneously regenerated, leading to multiple Cy Youngs, at a period when most pitchers begin to break down and struggle.

5) Clemens was entirely clean, in spite of mountains of evidence that hundreds of players were using HGH and/or steroids, and a "don't ask, don't tell" culture had developed in baseball.

Were I an unbiased observer, it would strain credulity beyond belief to think that Clemens is the one individual telling the whole unvarnished truth while everyone else is lying and misremembering. As a biased observer, I hope they throw the lying, bat-throwing, ass-injecting, steroid freak in prison.

Unifying Theory of British Culture

1. The British like tea.

2. The British have bad teeth.

3. Brushing your teeth makes your tea taste bad for hours afterwards.

Conclusion: The British have bad teeth so that their tea will taste better.

QED

No Burnination, Unfortunately

From Norbert, who is kind of a dragon in his own right:

Wrecruting Wrapup

Notre Dame wrapped up a remarkably successful recruiting class this Wednesday on National Signing Day. According to both Rivals and Scout, the class ranked second in the country. However, by the time August rolls around, it will likely be upgraded to #1. The current #1 belongs to Alabama, but Nick Saban signed 31 players to his class, of which only 25 are expected to qualify academically.

Notre Dame signed 165 (edit: 16!) of the top 250 players in the country, according to Rivals. Even more impressive is that the Irish signed 5 of the top 37: QB Dayne Crist (#25), WR Michael Floyd (#20), TE Kyle Rudolph (#27), OG Trevor Robinson (#37), and DE Ethan Johnson (#32). Here's the full rundown:

Hat's off to Charlie Weis and the Notre Dame coaching staff for doing such an incredible job keeping this class together in the face of a 3-9 season.

While we're on the subject of incredible coaching jobs, Notre Dame basketball is now ranked #21 in the country and is sitting at 8-2 in the Big East. For a team that was projected to come in ninth in the conference, they've really exceeded expectations.

Snow Day!

10-16 inches of snow? No problem!

25 Years of Kicking Ass and Taking Names

Well, maybe not kicking ass, but you get the idea.

Today, your friend and mine, Big Jim, turns 25. And boy, do we have an all-star lineup to wish him a happy birthday.

First up, two-time NFL MVP and reigning (for one more day) Super Bowl champion Peyton Manning.

Thanks, Peyton. Next, a special message from our friends at Anheuser Busch:

Bud Light presents, "Real Men of Genius." (Real Men of Genius.)

Today we salute you, Jim, Mr. Really Special Birthday Celebrator. (Mr. Really Special Birthday Celebrator!)

Some say you're a year older, some say a year wiser, and some say, "Why is a 25-year-old still celebrating their birthday?" (Cause I can!)

They say with age comes wisdom. Unfortunately, it also comes with varicose veins and thinning hair. (I'm wearing black socks with sandals!)

Tonight, you and your friends will party in the roped off section of the hottest club in town. Except in your case, it's the line to get inside. (Let us in!)

So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, O Admiral of the Ageless. Because even though you're 25, you'll always be #1 with us. (Happy birthday to yoooou!)

Lastly, Carmen Electra called and said she didn't want to miss the chance to confess a secret to you (and promote her latest movie, of course).

Happy birthday, Big Jim!

Election Probabilities

Chances of Republican Victory:
McCain v. Clinton: 50%
Romney v. Clinton: 30%
McCain v. Obama: 20%
Romney v. Obama: 5%

I think the chances of any Republican beating Obama are quite slim. The only chances Romney has are if Obama makes some big gaffe or if the Democratic primary process drags on considerably and leaves Obama damaged goods. (Bill Clinton is certainly doing his part in this regard.) McCain has a better shot against Obama, but it would still be a very difficult fight.

Both Republicans have a better shot against Clinton, but only McCain gives the party an even shot of holding the White House. McCain has a chance to pull in a number of independents that Romney likely wouldn't. Regardless of who the GOP candidate is, if Clinton is the opponent, the election would largely be a referendum on her.

What say you, Big Jim?

The Right Talk Express

The Corner is one of my favorite websites. But the vitriol displayed by some contributors to McCain has made it almost unreadable. In the last 24 hours, he's been compared to Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, Ted Kennedy, and Lord Voldemort.

I understand that Levin, Lopez, and some others don't care for McCain. But their insistence on looking at everything he does through a bad faith lens combined with their uncritical fawning over Romney are unbecoming and unhelpful. There are huge distinctions to be drawn between McCain and Clinton/Obama, and these "conservative leaders" are doing both the movement and the nation a disservice with their unwillingness to draw them.

Classic Family Guy Humor

Peter: Brian, I feel awful. Stewie and I were getting along so good, but now he hates me. How do I get him to like me again?

Brian: Well, that depends. Do you really want my advice or are you just asking random questions again?

Peter: What's a hypotenuse?

Poetic Interlude

Silky smoothness
I'll never again neglect to
Change
Your blades regularly
Fusion

Not Just America's Team

Video brought to my attention by a certain Cuban:

Election Hijinx, Shenanigans, and Tomfoolery

Start here. Lee Atwater was a Democratic bogeyman when Karl Rove was still wetting his political diapers. There's a reason people still talk about Willie Horton.

Whaaaa?

Conclusion of a decent Joe Klein column:

It may well be true that any Democrat is going to have to handle that sort of sewage in the general election, but I've now--belatedly!--figured out that the real audacity in Barack Obama's campaign--far more than his positions on the issues, which almost seem an afterthought--is his outrageous belief that the entire country, not just Democrats, wants to see a straight up election; that the entire country is tired of the pestilence of tactical tricks that the Clintons learned from their co-dynasts, the Bushes. (The latest example being their sudden, sociopathic emphasis on the importance of the Florida primary, a contest all three candidates had agreed to eschew at the behest of the Democatic National Committee.

It is a hell of a bet Obama has made. And nearly 40 years of political, uhm, experience tells me that it isn't a very wise one...but I must also say that it is truly sad to see Bill and Hillary Clinton on the wrong side of it.

What got me was the line about the Bushes. Just what did Bill learn from Papa Bush. I presume that Joe doesn't think that Karl Rove had already assumed the position of Prince of Darkness in 1992. Rico?

Being poor rules!

Actually, working for half a year while marrying a student and being a parent rules. Thanks to the federal government's largesse (specifically via the Earned Income and Additional Child credits), we are getting $2,968 in tax credits even though we didn't withhold a penny in 2007. If we add in the $79 from the state, we're getting over $3,000 for no reason. If we further add in the estimated $900 we're allegedly going to get to "stimulate the economy" this summer, that's nearly $4,000.

Maybe I should start voting Democrat...

A short list of awesome things

1. This story about robots evolving and learning how to lie. Awesome and troubling at the same time.

2. The video game Bully. It's a less homicidal version of Grand Theft Auto. It's the first video game I have bought in a while, and it's been a blast.

3. This dream I had last night (or was it two nights ago?) where I was running for president and got into a verbal fight with Mike Huckabee in a parking garage overlooking Notre Dame's spring football game. Awesome because it gives a deep insight into my psyche and the things that occupy my brain power.

4. Antonin Scalia. It's really fun to see ostensibly liberal law students persuaded by sheer force of his reasoning. It's equally fun to see other liberal students trash him because they think they are supposed to, without actually addressing his arguments.

5. Eli Manning and the New York Giants. Simply because I don't think I could have stomached two weeks of Packer hype and Favre news converage without harming myself or others.

Hippies!

Social Conservatives, Electability, and Mike Huckabee

Generally, voting based purely on "electability" is dumb. We saw that in 2004 when the democrats nominated John Kerry even though no one seemed to have any actual affinity for him. A collective groupthink set in where everyone seemed to convince everyone else that Kerry would be the most likely candidate to win in the general election. Maybe that was true and maybe it wasn't. But the fact remains that very few people were actually fired up or excited by Kerry. Had democrats nominated their true love, Howard Dean, who knows what would have happened?

Having said all that, electability needs to be a factor when deciding whom to support. I bring this up because social conservatives understandably love Mike Huckabee. It makes sense, given his outspoken views on issues such as abortion and gay marriage. Social conservatives view Huckabee as one of them. While I still think it's unlikely that Huckabee will be nominated (because he hasn't shown a real ability to pull in voters outside his base), if he were the nominee, it would be disastrous for the GOP in general and social conservatives in particular.

Were Huckabee the nominee, he would alienate most moderates and all liberals with his uncompromising far right social views. Further, he would alienate a large segment of the conservative base with his populist, leftist, protectionist economic rhetoric. Alienating voters across the political spectrum is generally a bad policy for winning elections. He would have virtually no chance in the general election. Simply put, nominating Huckabee would give the Democratic party two years of complete control over the federal government.

In those two years, the democratic majority would roll back protections against the unborn, put gay marriage on the table, and most importantly, replace John Paul Stevens (and possibly Ruth Bader Ginsburg) with young liberal Justices. These moves would render the efforts of the last 20 years to develop a culture of life in America and overturn Roe entirely meaningless. If you're a social conservative, the worst thing you can do for your cause is nominate Mike Huckabee.

What Else Floats on Water?

A friend and commenter sent me this little tidbit from the Smithsonian Magazine:

Think of this. The most distinguished graduate college at Oxford is All Souls, founded in 1438 and popularly alleged to number among its Fellows the cleverest men and women in England. Once in every hundred years this eminent company celebrates something called the ceremony of the mallard, when it commemorates the fable of a wild duck supposed to have flown out of the foundations when the college was being built. After a good and vinous dinner those academics perambulate the premises looking for the shade of that bird, carrying sticks and staves, led by a Lord Mallard in a sedan chair with a dead duck on a pole, climbing to the roof and singing a gibberish song—Ho, the blood of King Edward, by the blood of King Edward, it was a swapping,
swapping mallard.

When in 2001 they celebrated the ceremony of the mallard for the umpteenth time, they printed a booklet about the occasion. On its cover they quoted a contemporary commentator (me, as it happened!) to the effect that no event in Europe could be sillier, "not the most footling country frolic or pointless Anatolian orgy."

Quote of the Day

I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass . . . and I'm all out of bubblegum.

Apparently it's from some movie called They Live.

Catholicism Is Awesome

Pretty amazing post over at the New Liturgical Movement.

Reason #941,408 I love The Onion

Stories that hit close to home:

"It takes Mr. Jenkins 4.33 milliseconds to retrieve the memory of holding his newborn sister for the first time, but just 1.09 milliseconds to retrieve the memory of knocking Pikachu off the Sector Z platform with Donkey Kong's 'ground pound' maneuver in Super Smash Bros.," McCarroll said. "In fact, the only school-related memory he is able to review as vividly as the underwater-bomb-defusing level of Nintendo Entertainment System's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is his first day of college, which was spent playing multiplayer GoldenEye 007 with his roommates."

Whatever. Everybody knows that the ground pound move sucks and no competent Donkey Konger would use it.

Er. Not that I've spent countless hours dissecting the strategy and physics underlying Smash Bros.

Tonight on Walker, Texas Ranger

Walker missed with a roundhouse kick to a villain's head. The villain asked, "What the hell was that?" To which Walker responded, "This," and proceeded to knock the bad guy out with a second roundhouse kick.

In fact, I am watching Walker on a Friday night. Thanks for asking. I think I might follow it up with a little Not Another Teen Movie.

So . . . Do You Like Comic Books?

Thought Rico might like this for the Wolverine bit. Kind of frightening though. Thankfully a fair amount of it is over my head. Conan is almost completely foreign to me. Never read any of the books and seen parts of two very, very bad movies. Red Sonja? Crom? Come to think of it, I don't know anyone except for Conan. The X-Men stuff, on the other hand, basically makes sense. Except for the Super Skrull. I think he's more Fantastic Four or Iron Man than X-Men though. I think we'll be fine without a Comic Books tab.

Watching "Sports," Eh?

I think we all know what Rico means by that:

Gladiator ready?

When I heard NBC was bringing back American Gladiators on the strength of good ratings for the reruns, I was both excited and apprehensive. Excited because a staple of my youth was returning to TV and apprehensive because I thought NBC would go ahead and ruin it. So it was with great anxiety that I watched the premier last night.

Unfortunately, some of my fears were well grounded. The original version of the show was over the top, but ultimately it was about athletic competition. The current incarnation was so slickly produced and entertainment-centric that you almost forgot that there was an actual sporting event going on. As someone who watches virtually any televised sport*, the focus on the theatrical aspects was frustrating. Hiring Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali to host certainly didn't help.

Having said all that, the show partially redeemed itself with the sheer awesomeness of the eliminator. One of the few problems with the original show was that the eliminator was usually anticlimactic, with one contender grabbing a lead and cruising to victory. Now, however, the course is so draining that just about anything could happen. It really made for compelling television.


* Seriously, I'll watch just about anything remotely athletic as long as it's competitive. Come Winter Olympics, I'm watching curling. When ESPN used to show putt-putt in the afternoon, I was all over that. Golf, tennis, bowling, ping pong, I'm there. My only exception is women's basketball. No one should ever be forced to watch that.

As a proud heterosexual man,

all I can say is I told you so.

Words fail

This is one of the saddest - and yet most touching and powerful - things I've ever read. It's the final post of the blog of Major Andrew Olmsted. He had it prepared in the event that he was killed in Iraq.

I rarely ask others to read specific things, but please follow the link and read what Major Olmsted wrote. Though woefully inadequate, taking the time to read it is still a way to honor the life and remember the death of a great American.

Last minute impressions

With the Iowa caucuses upon us, I've been watching a lot of news coverage. The more I watch, the more I like Romney and dislike Huckabee. Huckabee is just extremely disingenuous in trying to run a "positive" campaign while constantly bashing Romney. Here's a note to Mike: Just because you don't mention your opponent by name, it doesn't make your insults any less negative.

So begins my life as a corporate sellout

I just shaved for the first time in more than six months in preparation for lunch with an attorney for Milwaukee's largest law firm.

If I'm going to be a corporate sellout, I'd at least like to be paid like one.

Poker: A Metaphor for Life

Teddy Roosevelt and the Square Deal:

A man who is good enough to shed his blood for his country is good enough to be given a square deal afterwards. More than that no man is entitled, and less than that no man shall have.

He would later expand on this idea:

When I say I believe in a square deal, I do not mean to give every man the best hand. If the cards do not come to any man, or if they do come and he has not got the power to play them, that is his affair. All I mean is that there shall be no crookedness in the dealing.

This is about as close to my personal political philosophy as any 100-year-old quote can come. And just for good measure, here's some more TR:

Thrice happy is the nation that has a glorious history. Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.

Indeed.

Most Excellent

Edit: You know, if you're going to have a "Commercials" tag, you might as well use it. Also, this commercial is about 6 months old.

--Rico

I'm not sure what's going on here,

but I want to be a part of it.



As longtime friends know, Big Jim and I spent the better part of our college years playing the original Super Smash Bros. If the Wii version were available during that time, let's just say there would have been blood shed.

"Get in the fray!"

A word of caution

If you don't care for the song "Frere Jacques," you probably shouldn't have a child.

Who's up for some Christmas late night election discussion?

I know I am!

Actually, I'm on late night guard in case my son wakes up. He may or may not be sick and is definitely teething, so he's hurting quite a bit.

Let's start with a look at the Democratic field.

Here, there are three names that merit any consideration: Hillary, Barack, and Edwards. Edwards is at an immediate disadvantage, since he must suffer the indignity of being identifiable only by his last name.

Hillary's advantages and disadvantages are almost universally known. Pluses: Strong name recognition, a competent and professional organization, a large lead in national polls. Minuses: a vitriolic hatred from nearly half the nation, significant past scandals, a cold demeanor. If she wins Iowa and New Hampshire, she will unquestionably win the nomination. If she fails to win those states, she'll still likely be the favorite, but the race will become much more interesting.

Obama's strength lies in his compelling stump speech, his unprecedented fundraising skills, and his ability to market himself as the candidate of 'change.' His formidable talents, however, have not translated into strong debate performances or a surge in national polls. He does have considerable support in the early states of Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina. To win the nomination, he's going to have to close strong in Iowa to convince Democratic partisans that he is (1) experienced enough to lead the country and (2) strong enough to fight off Republican attacks.

Edwards is an interesting case. Four years ago, he rode his boyish good looks, inoffensive speech, and southern charm to give John Kerry his only real opposition in the primaries. This time around, he's the unapologetic, fire-breathing populist liberal who hasn't found a rich person he can't disparage. He has many weaknesses as a candidate, foremost the contrast between his rhetoric and his lifestyle, but he appeals to the Angry Left. He has very little support after the early states, so to have any chance at winning the nomination, he's going to have to win Iowa convincingly and ride a wave of free media coverage into the other states. Anything short of a large Iowa victory will not be enough.

Joe Biden, Bill Richardson, Chris Dodd, and Dennis Kucinich are irrelevant. Having said that, I think Biden's been spectacular in the debates I've seen.

On the Republican side, there are six (Six!) candidates worth discussing.

Rudy Giuliani has long been the national frontrunner. For more than a year, he's led virtually every national poll of Republicans, based on his strong name recognition and great support as New York City's 9/11 mayor. The question a year ago is the same question he faces today: How will his liberal social policies affect his chances? As the first primaries become closer, it appears that the answer is "Considerably and negatively." Though Rudy has done an admirable job on the campaign trial playing up his national security and low-tax credentials, his denial of the pro-life segment of the party has begun to hurt him. To win the nomination, he simply has to do well enough to get to February 5th with enough credibility to carry states like Florida.

Before Giuliani was the frontrunner, most observers expected John McCain to be the party's 2008 nominee. However, over the past 18 months, McCain's campaign imploded and appeared on the verge of ruin. It's only been over the past few months that conservative voters have given him a second look and decided that they might like what they see. His weaknesses (a maverick reputation, a good relationship with the media, and his age) aren't going away, but McCain appears to be positioning himself as the second choice of many voters. To win, he'll need to replicate his 2000 success in New Hampshire and convince enough conservatives that he is the least of several evils.

Of the major contenders, only Mitt Romney has run a traditional Republican campaign. Romney has spent millions more than anyone in Iowa, campaigned aggressively in New Hampshire, and touted his conservative credentials. Those credentials, however, have come into question because of Romney's changed position on many issues. It's expected that candidates will position themselves effectively to win elections, but when a politician changes his position on abortion, stem-cell research, gun rights, immigration, and a host of other issues, it leaves voters wondering what the man really believes. For Romney to win, I believe he must win Iowa. Given the time and money he invested there, anything other than a victory will inevitably be portrayed as a failure.

Mike Huckabee has come from nowhere to be Romney's most credible challenger in Iowa. The former governor of Arkansas has used a strong emphasis on religion as well as a unique brand of working class populism to appeal to a large segment of primary voters who had been dissatisfied with the slate of candidates. Since his meteoric rise in the polls, Huckabee has faced increased scrutiny over his tenure as governor and inconsistencies within his positions. Like Romney, Huckabee probably needs to win Iowa to have a realistic shot at winning the nomination. He faces an uphill battle because he lacks Romney's fundraising revenues as well as Giuliani's and McCain's name recognition. Consequently, free media coverage is a key to his campaign.

Fred Thompson is the last of the major Republican candidate. A year ago, no one considered him as a possibility, but six months ago, he was viewed as a potential savior in an otherwise weak field. Like most political messiahs, Thompson has underwhelmed. (See also Clark, Wesley.) Thompson has shown little desire to do the kind of retail politicking necessary in Iowa and New Hampshire and has instead seemed content to rely on his fame to earn him the nomination. Thompson's best shot at winning the nomination is a muddled early race that leaves no clear frontrunner but several candidates bruised. At that point, Thompson would need to perform well in the southern primaries and emerge as a compromise choice among voters.

Ron Paul will not win the Republican nomination. Still, he deserves to be mentioned because he has really tapped into a mine of anger among a distinct core of supporters. He has translated this support into more than $12 million in donations in the fourth quarter. This is absolutely uncharted territory for a argely unknown Congressman from Texas. Depending on how Paul decides to use the money, he could go a long way to determining who wins the nomination-indeed he could help decide the presidency if he runs as an independent candidate.

I have to confirm with Big Jim, but I'm pretty sure our editorial endorsement will be coming out soon. Perhaps surprisingly, I think we're on the same page.

From Our Blogging Family to Yours,

Merry Christmas.

Damn

17
Though I suspect Big Jim's opinion of himself is exaggerated.

Awesome

26
Well, Rico, how about you?

My confession

Since I've been on break, I've been watching as much Walker, Texas Ranger as possible.

I find the show oddly compelling, plus Walker is a great role model for Jake. Since my wife is an only child and I have just one sibling, Jake doesn't have much going for him in the way of aunts and uncles. Consequently, I've decided that from now on, we're going to call Chuck Norris 'Uncle Chuck.'

To top it off, the show has the greatest theme song of all time:

In the eyes of a ranger,
The unsuspecting stranger
Had better know the truth of wrong from right.

Cause the eyes of a ranger are upon you,
Any wrong you do he's gonna see,
When you're in Texas look behind you,
Cause that's where the rangers are gonna be

A friendly reminder

The following is a public service announcement from all of us here at Whatever Happened to Crazy? to Christian rock radio stations everywhere:

Christmas music, especially the religious variety, is a sacred thing. Many of these songs have been around for decades, entertaining us, but also inspiring us and reminding us of the true meaning of Christmas. With that in mind, the music should not be altered beyond recognition. Specifically, "O Holy Night" does not need a drum solo. I'm looking at you, 105.3 The Fish.

Eleven months out of the year, most of us are happy to ignore your silly genre. But in December, do us all a favor and leave well enough alone.

Blame Canada?

What the hell's going on? Really. From Ezra Levant in the National Post (not exactly a bastion of Conservatism):

The Canadian Islamic Congress (CIC) is taking Maclean’s magazine to a human rights commission. Their crime? Refusing the CIC’s absurd demand that Maclean’s print a five-page letter to the editor in response to an article the CIC didn’t like.

It may shock those who do not follow human-rights law in Canada, but Maclean’s will probably lose.

Forcing editors to publish rambling letters is not a human right in Canada. But that’s not how the CIC worded their complaint, filed with the B.C., Ontario and federal human rights commissions. Maclean’s is “flagrantly Islamophobic” and “subjects Canadian Muslims to hatred and contempt” according to a CIC statement. “I felt personally victimized,” said Khurrum Awan at the CIC’s recent press conference. All this because Maclean’s dared to run a column discussing the demographic rise of Islam in the West.

It’s a new strategy for the CIC, which in the past has tried unsuccessfully to sue news media it disagreed with — including the National Post — using Canada’s defamation laws. But Canada’s civil courts aren’t the best tool for that sort of bullying. In a defamation lawsuit, the CIC would have to hire its own lawyers, follow the rules of court, and prove that they suffered real damages — and the newspapers would have truth and fair comment as defences. Launching a nuisance suit against Maclean’s would result in an embarrassing loss for the CIC, a court order to pay the magazine’s legal fees, and it would deepen the CIC’s reputation as a group of radicals who don’t understand Canadian values. (Three years ago, Mohamed Elmasry, the CIC’s Egyptian-born president, declared that every adult Jew in Israel is a legitimate target for terrorists).

So civil lawsuits won’t work. Criminal charges are a non-starter, too: Canada’s hate-speech laws are reserved for extreme acts of incitement, and charges can only be laid with the approval of the justice minister. And in criminal court, the accused must be proved guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. No chance there.

That’s why human-rights commissions are the perfect instrument for the CIC. The CIC doesn’t even have to hire a lawyer: Once the complaint has been accepted by the commissions, taxpayers’ dollars and government lawyers are used to pursue the matter. Maclean’s, on the other hand, will have to hire their own lawyers with their own money. Rules of court don’t apply. Normal rules of evidence don’t apply. The commissions are not neutral; they’re filled with activists, many of whom aren’t even lawyers and do not understand the free-speech safeguards contained in our constitution.

And the punishments that these commissions can order are bizarre. Besides fines to the government and payments to complainants, defendants can be forced to “apologize” for having unacceptable political or religious opinions.

An apology might not sound onerous, yet it is far more troubling than a fine. Ordering a person — or a magazine — to say or publish words that they don’t believe is an Orwellian act of thought control. The editor of Maclean’s, Ken Whyte, maintains his magazine is fair. But human rights commissions have the power to order him to publish a confession that he’s a bigot — or, as in one Ontario case, even order someone to study Islam. Even convicted murderers cannot be “ordered” to apologize.

What Levant never mentions is that the incomparable Mark Steyn was the featured author in most of those MacLean's articles.

Just What McCain Needed

to bring him over the tipping point:

Joementum.

Ask and it will be given to you

"Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7

On Thursday night, Big Jim asked me when Trevor Robinson was going to commit to Notre Dame. Less than 24 hours later, he officially committed.

Now I'm pretty sure Jesus was talking about going to God with your prayers, but I suppose asking me is the next best thing.

With that in mind, let's take a look at the recruiting chart. Notre Dame now has 22 commitments from high school seniors. Of those, 9 are among the top 100 players in the nation, and 18 are among the top 250. Simply a stunning job for a 3-9 team. As always, the absurdly subjective rankings courtesy of Rivals.



Offense
QB: Dayne Crist (#20)
RB: Jonas Gray (#56)
WR: Michael Floyd (#81)
WR: John Goodman (#221)
TE: Kyle Rudolph (#17)
TE: Joseph Fauria (#180)
OT: Lane Clelland (#125)
OG: Trevor Robinson (#97)
OG/C: Braxston Cave (#223)
OG/C: Mike Golic, Jr. (NR)

Defense
DE: Ethan Johnson (#29)
DE: Sean Cwynar (#160)
NT: Omar Hunter (#50)
NT: Brandon Newman (NR)
NT: Hafis Williams (NR)
OLB: Darius Fleming (#96)
OLB: David Posluszny (NR)
ILB: Steve Filer (#76)
ILB: Anthony McDonald (#198)
CB: Robert Blanton (#202)
S: Jamoris Slaughter (#122)
S: Dan McCarthy (#174)

One thing to note about this class is its great balance. One of the recurring flaws in Notre Dame's recruiting has been terribly unbalanced classes. See, e.g., Bob Davie's three quarterbacks in one year, Tyrone Willingham's woeful offensive line recruiting, and Charlie Weis' two-year failure in signing defensive linemen. This year, the only position where we would appear to have an excess of players is on the defensive line, where the team needs both quantity and quality desperately.

For those interested, we'll do one last recruiting wrap up after National Signing Day (February 5, 2008).

Seven Words I Always Say:

Rico's a bum for liking country music.

Eight words I never thought I'd say

I really like the new Bucky Covington song.

The chorus:

It's good to be us, good to be breathing
Day after night after day, this feeling
Feels the way it should
If this is as good as it gets, then good

It's better than best, yeah we got it made
In the shade, in the sun, in love this way - yeah
We got lucky baby, we've been blessed
Couldn't ask for more, wouldn't settle for less
It's good to be us, yeah, it's good to be us

My true calling

With finals over, I have a four-week break before school starts again.

This leaves me free to pursue my true calling in life: stay-at-home dad and professional blogger.

If only I could get paid for this.

Still the Man

GKC on pride and humility, from Orthodoxy:

In one way Man was to be haughtier than he had ever been before; in another way he was to be humbler than he had ever been before. In so far as I am Man I am the chief of creatures. In so far as I am a man I am the chief of sinners. All humility that had meant pessimism, that had meant man taking a vague or mean view of his whole destiny -- all that was to go. We were to hear no more the wail of Ecclesiastes that humanity had no pre-eminence over the brute, or the awful cry of Homer that man was only the saddest of all the beasts of the field. Man was a statue of God walking about the garden. Man had pre-eminence over all the brutes; man was only sad because he was not a beast, but a broken god. The Greek had spoken of men creeping on the earth, as if clinging to it. Now Man was to tread on the earth as if to subdue it. Christianity thus held a thought of the dignity of man that could only be expressed in crowns rayed like the sun and fans of peacock plumage. Yet at the same time it could hold a thought about the abject smallness of man that could only be expressed in fasting and fantastic submission, in the gray ashes of St. Dominic and the white snows of St. Bernard. When one came to think of one's self, there was vista and void enough for any amount of bleak abnegation and bitter truth. There the realistic gentleman could let himself go -- as long as he let himself go at himself. There was an open playground for the happy pessimist. Let him say anything against himself short of blaspheming the original aim of his being; let him call himself a fool and even a damned fool (though that is Calvinistic); but he must not say that fools are not worth saving. He must not say that a man, qua man, can be valueless. Here, again in short, Christianity got over the difficulty of combining furious opposites, by keeping them both, and keeping them both furious. The Church was positive on both points. One can hardly think too little of one's self. One can hardly think too much of one's soul.

Music Update

Favorite bits of Classical music at the moment:

1. 3rd movement to Mozart's Symphony No. 39

2. 2nd movement to Beethoven's Piano Concerto No. 5 "Emperor"

3. 1st movement to Bach's Suite No. 4

4. 5th movement to Lalo's Spanish Symphony

and of course

5. 1st movement to Beethoven's Symphony No. 7
6. 4th movement to Mozart's Symphony No. 41 "Jupiter"
7. Holst's "Jupiter"

On a side note, I had forgotten how bad "Away in a Manger."

Math Can't Be Wrong

The Transitive Property of Football strikes again. From j9er on Cartier Field over at ND Nation:

Why the BCS Rankngs are Wrong and Notre Dame Should Be in the Title Game
**Notre Dame beat UCLA, Stanford, and Duke.**

1. Ohio State (Notre Dame beat UCLA beat Oregon beat Michigan beat Illinois beat Ohio State)
2. LSU (Notre Dame beat UCLA beat California beat Tennessee beat Georgia beat Kentucky beat LSU)
3. Va Tech (Notre Dame beat UCLA beat California beat Tennessee beat Georgia beat Kentucky beat Va Tech)
4. Oklahoma (Notre Dame beat Stanford beat USC beat ASU beat Colorado beat Oklahoma)
5. Georgia (Notre Dame beat UCLA beat California beat Tennessee beat Georgia)
6. Missouri (Notre Dame beat Stanford beat USC beat ASU beat Colorado beat Oklahoma beat Missouri)
7. USC (Notre Dame beat Stanford beat USC)
8. Kansas (Notre Dame beat Stanford beat USC beat ASU beat Colorado beat Oklahoma beat Missouri beat Kansas)
9. West Virginia (Notre Dame beat Stanford beat Oregon beat Michigan beat Illinois beat Wisconsin beat Michigan State beat Pittsburgh beat WVU)
10. Hawaii (only team in the country better than Notre Dame)

See you in New Orleans for Hawaii vs. Notre Dame.

Because It's Damn Good

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep.

Now I Get It

Finally, a grand theory of the Star Wars universe. Not that probably aren't eleventy billion out there already, but to create so elegant a synthesis of all six movies was truly a work of art. Truly Lucas has a uniquely singular and opaque vision to so cleverly disguise so fascinating a story. And under our very noses!

In the words of the immortal O. Sharp:

It all makes sense, that perfect kind of sense that only comes with excessive drinking.

I should probably warn you, gentle reader, that full appreciation of said theory is dependent (shudder) on having seen and remembered the events of Episdoes 1 through 3.

A New Triumph

Someone's only got 10 messages in his inbox. Never thought I'd see the day. Now if only my room were that tidy . . .

How Many Narrators?

The Evidence:

This Season
(Words and music by Kirk McLeod, arranged by Seven Nations)

Daniel closed his eyes as if it didn't happen
And he wondered why every time this season
Feel it in the air, see it in the lightning
And he wondered why it always felt so frightening

I will remember you this way
As sure as the night divides the day
As sure as the sun goes down

Then he looked at me his eyes heavy with reason
And he spoke of how she never stopped to listen
When she got the news she wrecked her room in anger
Never looked at me, she telephoned the doctor

I will remember you this way
As sure as the night divides the day
As sure as the sun goes down

Which way's on and on, his question fell
Like rain on the window like I never will
His face touched the glass, his finger traced
The path of the water
The lines on his face

I will remember you this way
As sure as the night divides the day
As sure as the sun goes down.

While the song is highly elliptical, the second verse effectively gives the game away. However, as the title of this post makes clear, it is not meaning but person that concerns me. In particular, who is the singer of the refrain? I highly recommend the song by the way, if for nothing else than the awesome (electric?) bagpipe riff.

One hour til Criminal Law

Am I ready to take this test? Let's just say I could step in tomorrow for Sam Waterston and nobody would know the difference.

As my wife pointed out, however, I wouldn't be nearly as effective selling robot insurance.