25 Years of Kicking Ass and Taking Names

Well, maybe not kicking ass, but you get the idea.

Today, your friend and mine, Big Jim, turns 25. And boy, do we have an all-star lineup to wish him a happy birthday.

First up, two-time NFL MVP and reigning (for one more day) Super Bowl champion Peyton Manning.

Thanks, Peyton. Next, a special message from our friends at Anheuser Busch:

Bud Light presents, "Real Men of Genius." (Real Men of Genius.)

Today we salute you, Jim, Mr. Really Special Birthday Celebrator. (Mr. Really Special Birthday Celebrator!)

Some say you're a year older, some say a year wiser, and some say, "Why is a 25-year-old still celebrating their birthday?" (Cause I can!)

They say with age comes wisdom. Unfortunately, it also comes with varicose veins and thinning hair. (I'm wearing black socks with sandals!)

Tonight, you and your friends will party in the roped off section of the hottest club in town. Except in your case, it's the line to get inside. (Let us in!)

So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, O Admiral of the Ageless. Because even though you're 25, you'll always be #1 with us. (Happy birthday to yoooou!)

Lastly, Carmen Electra called and said she didn't want to miss the chance to confess a secret to you (and promote her latest movie, of course).

Happy birthday, Big Jim!