Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Sooooo tedious

"The trial court's analysis, however, failed to take into account the fact that grapes can be expected to roll if they fall on the ground."

My quandry

A few weekends ago, Mrs. Rico was walking out of Starbucks when a 16-year-old kid scraped the rear corner of our car. He was totally cooperative and gave her his contact and insurance information.

I brought the car into the body shop a few days ago for an estimate, and it came in at slightly over $400. According to the shop, my car's totally masculine and heterosexual color is quite difficult to match.

This brings me to my dilemma. The kid's dad promised to cut me a check for $410. That's a pretty big chunk of change for two students with an infant son. Should we use the money to get the car fixed? Let's look at this from a few angles.

Economic: From a pure economic analysis, it would be foolish to spend the money this way. In other words, getting the car fixed simply isn't "worth" that much money to me. Were the scratches caused by some unknown driver in the Marquette parking lot, there's virtually no chance that I would be spending $400 to get them fixed, even if I found the money lying on the street. So, cost-benefit analysis points to "no."

Legal: As a law student, it behooves me to know and follow the law. However, I have no clue whether I'm required to use the money to get the repairs done. Even better, I'm not sure where to look. However, I suppose that when I'm not sure what the law is, I should steer the unquestionably legal course. This would point to "yes."

Ethical: Here's where I'm stumped. Is there some sort of moral imperative to use the money for the purpose which it was intended? Personally, I'm leaning against the idea, but that could just be because I want the freedom to spend the money on a Nintendo Wii. Where's an ethicist when I need one?

I suppose it's a moot point, given that the wife will make the decision anyway.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Lyle Landry?

I'd be more enthused if it were Lyle Lanley. You know, Commons put North Haverbrook, Brockway, and Ogdenville on the map!

Lyle Lanley: Well, sir, there's nothing on earth
Like a genuine,
Bona fide,
What'd I say?

Ned Flanders: Commons!

Lyle Lanley: What's it called?

Patty+Selma: Commons!

Lyle Lanley: That's right! Commons!

[crowd chants `Commons' softly and rhythmically]

Miss Hoover: I hear those things are awfully loud...

Lyle Lanley: It glides as softly as a cloud.

Apu: Is there a chance the track could bend?

Lyle Lanley: Not on your life, my Hindu friend.

Barney: What about us brain-dead slobs?

Lyle Lanley: You'll be given cushy jobs.

Abe: Were you sent here by the devil?

Lyle Lanley: No, good sir, I'm on the level.

Wiggum: The ring came off my pudding can.

Lyle Lanley: Take my pen knife, my good man.

I swear it's Eddy's only choice...
Throw up your hands and raise your voice!

All: Commons!

Lyle Lanley: What's it called?

All: Commons!

Lyle Lanley: Once again...

All: Commons!

Marge: But Stepan's still all cracked and broken...

Bart: Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken!

All: Commons!

[big finish]


Homer: Comm... D'oh!

The Future Is Now

Brought to you by Lyle Landry, Notre Dame's new Eddy Street Commons:

It looks fantastic. I just hope it has some color and isn't completely filled with Fridays. A mere three would be perfect.

An early Christmas present

So so so awesome.

Monday, October 29, 2007

I love being right

You'd think the joy would wear off after it's happened to many times, but you'd be wrong.

The Red Sox victory in game 1 was a crushing blow to the Rockies and their magical run. It led to their sweep. As I predicted, the game 1 winner would roll.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Were I to start another blog,

it would be titled "Jesus is my Consigliere."

Friday, October 26, 2007


I too thought it was a quality episode. Are Elliott and Keith done for good though? My thoughts on the matter are similar to JD's. Beardface is the man. As, it would appear, is JD.

Thursday, October 25, 2007


I really enjoyed tonight's premiere and thought it was an excellent job setting up JD's big story arc for the final season. An extended cameo from Dr. Beardface never hurts, either.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Recruiting Update

Despite last weekend's debacle, Notre Dame managed to secure commitments from two of the more highly-recruited offensive players in the country, RB Jonas Gray (#52) and WR Michael Floyd (#79). Here is the visual update to the recruiting year for the Irish. Again, ridiculous rankings are courtesy of Rivals.

Last minute World Series prediction

Game 1 is obviously important in any playoff series, but it's even more important than usual here. Whoever wins tonight will win the series.

The Rockies have been on a magical streak, but they've been idle for 8 days. It remains to be seen whether they can keep up their ridiculous pace in the face of the long break, and if they lose tonight, much of the past month's magic will wear off.

For the Red Sox, Josh Beckett carried the team through the ALCS. He won 2 of the first 5 games of the series, salvaging a chance for the team to rally against the Indians. If Beckett loses tonight, it will crush all the momentum Boston gained in the last three games against Cleveland.

Who to choose: The hottest team or the hottest player? If history has taught us anything, it's that dominant pitching wins in October. That's why I'm picking Beckett and Boston to win game 1 and the World Series.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Completely Uncalled For

A variation on an oldie but goodie:

Monday, October 22, 2007

If it's good enough for Chuck Norris...

it's good enough for me. You just knew he'd pick a Republican.

If I were an Indian

Tough break for Cleveland. It must be even tougher to know that any chance the Indians blew any chance they had to win the World Series for the next five years, what with the Brewers dynasty starting...


(PS: Bonecrusher, feel free to enter your gloating comments here.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

If I Were a Heathen . . .

Not the best fit anymore (The world has changed a bit since GK was in his heyday), but I think the poem is at the very least applicable to Al Gore and Co. The third illustration is my favorite.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Heart Bleeds

Headline from Yahoo:
As violence falls in Iraq, cemetary workers feel the pinch.
Could it be that we're actually beginning to win?

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Weird parallels

The struggling Vikings won today to move to 2-3. Adrian Peterson set a Minnesota record by rushing for 224 yards. This impressive achievement was accomplished in spite of boneheaded coach Brad Childress, who gave the obviously inferior Chester Taylor more carries than Peterson.

Fast forward to 2003:

The struggling Irish won today to move to 2-3. Julius Jones set a Notre Dame record by rushing for 262 yards. This impressive achievement was accomplished in spite of boneheaded coach Tyrone Willingham, who gave the obviously inferior Ryan Grant more carries than Jones.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

In a world where black is white and up is down...

Remember a couple of weeks ago when USC, LSU, Oklahoma, Florida, and West Virginia were the top five teams in the country?

Me neither.

Friday, October 12, 2007


Rivals has taken on the ridiculous task of ranking the top 250 high school football payers in the nation. As ridiculous as the whole endeavor is, it's not going to stop me from using it to become overly optimistic about Notre Dame's future!

According to Rivals, 14 of the top 209 players in the country have committed to Notre Dame. There is a good balance of offensive and defensive players, and perhaps most importantly, Notre Dame will likely bring in its most impressive collection of defensive linemen and linebackers in well over a decade.

Here are the players' national ranks.

#17: Kyle Rudolph, TE
#20: Dayne Crist, QB
#116: Lane Cleland, OT
#167: Joseph Fauria, TE
#202: John Goodman, WR
#206: Braxston Cave, OG/OC
Unranked: Mike Golic, OG/C

#29: Ethan Johnson, DE
#70: Steve Filer, ILB/OLB
#78: Omar Hunter, NT
#90: Darius Fleming, OLB
#117: Jamoris Salughter, S
#147: Robert Blanton, CB
#160: Sean Cwynar, DE/DT
#194: Anthony McDonald, ILB
Unranked: Dan McCarthy, S
Unranked: Brandon Newman, NT
Unranked: Hafis Williams, DE/DT
Unranked: David Posluszny, ILB/OLB

All in all, it's quite an impressive collection of talent. Perhaps more impressive will be the coaching staff's ability to keep the class together in spite of Notre Dame's on-field struggles this year.

I'll leave it to Big Jim to determine the players most likely to fill out the remainder of the class. It's not like Classics graduate students are particularly busy.

Is Iraq getting better?

Between an infant son and the first year of law school, I've almost completely stopped following national and international news. Based on my extremely spotty news consumption, however, it seems like things are steadily improving in Iraq.

However, I could be totally off base. Can anyone tell me if this is true or not?

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Brian Fantana

That's the alias I ended up using for my paper this week. It makes sense, because I am the stylish one of the group.

All that remains to be seen is whether I have the "balls" to use James Westphal and Dr. Kenneth Noisewater for my final two papers.

Letsa Go!

Indians 6-4.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Friday, October 5, 2007


Tribe 2-1

That's a relief

I was beginning to worry that the Mossad had silenced Big Jim.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Tuesday, October 2, 2007


In my legal writing class, we have to submit our papers under pseudonyms. Clearly, I used Johnny Rico as my first one. Now, I have to decide where to go for my next three. So many choices. . .

Continuing the Starship Troopers theme: Ace Levy, Drill Sergeant Zim, and Sky Marshall Tahatmaru.

Marvel Villians with ridiculous names: Victor Von Doom, Otto Octavius, and the Mandarin.

My favorite X-Men's alter-egos: Peter Rasputin, Remy LeBeau, and Bobby Drake.

Underused and underappreciated Smash Bros. characters: Yoshi, Fox McLeod, and Captain Falcon.

One-time Simpsons appearances: Frank Grimes, Hank Scorpio, and Sideshow Cecil.